The Importance of Being Earnest: Aside from the Witticisms of Oscar Wilde

“To be natural is such a very difficult pose to keep up.”

I often over-think interactions with others. I read into not only what’s said but also what goes unsaid. It’s something that acting has taught me to do –scratch beneath the surface. Usually, people aren’t going to come right out and tell you exactly what they’re thinking, and sometimes they’re not going to admit it to themselves. I guess that’s one of the beautiful things about being alive – the complexity of the human existence.

Especially in this day and age, with the bombardment and overt presence of social media, we’re even more careful with what we share with each other. There’s a veneer of happiness, without delving into what’s underneath the surface. We want information quickly, and we don’t want a lot of detail. This prevalence of insincerity is what makes genuine enthusiasm, or earnestness, important.

When you see it or hear it, it’s almost like striking gold. There’s this purity about someone who is earnestly wanting to do something or be something.  

It can also be a very tender thing for one to have earnest goals and intentions. There is a gentleness there that needs to be cultivated. I’d like to think that genuine intentions and interactions are rewarded — maybe not immediately or in the way that you initially expected. I think the majority of people want to help, and when you voice what your heart wants, or what your soul wants, people will do whatever they can to help you achieve that. I’m not saying that they’re going to just hand over the keys to the castle, but they may know someone who knows someone. No matter what industry or business you find yourself in, connections and networks are the keys to opening new doors. You still have to work hard and make the effort, but one of the things that links highly successful people is that they aren’t afraid to stop and ask someone else questions or have conversations. It is through those conversations, that the next steps start to form.

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The Sorry Challenge

I have a really bad habit of apologizing for absolutely nothing. I find the words “I’m sorry” escaping from my lips all too often. It could almost be my catch phrase.

“I’m sorry,” I say as I’m pouring sugar into my coffee at work, and someone reached across me to get some sugar.

“I’m sorry,” I say as I incidentally tried to occupy the same space as someone else.

“I’m sorry,” I say as I inadvertently reach for the same apple that someone else is also reaching for at the store.

Why do I feel the need to apologize? I can guarantee these random strangers don’t stay awake at night cursing that girl who was getting coffee at the same time that they wanted to get coffee. If they are, well, that’s their problem. They need help.

The more I’ve noticed myself apologizing for nothing; the more I realize this is a very common problem. What is with the plethora of apologies for existing?

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Clowning Around

As I mentioned, I love to tell stories. I love to entertain. If I can make you laugh, it makes my day (and if you’re just being polite, I appreciate the encouragement.) 

My mom says that I should be a stand-up comedian. My boyfriend says I tell tall tales. Fibs. I extrapolate. Make things more interesting. Change the wording. I say that I said something, but in reality, I didn’t. I thought it. The wheels in my mind were turning, but I chicken out. I say something more polite or less complicated. Something bland, but later, I’ll say I said it. I was brave. I spoke out —loud and proud, everyone laughed, and I was happy. 

My final semester of college, I took a clowning class (Yes. They have those. Don’t judge me. My major was just as real as yours — we’ll get to that post later.) It was a lot of fun, and I find myself drawn to the lessons I learned: 

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